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I used to struggle with saying “YES!” too often at work. It conditioned others to view me as the “go-to” when hard things needed to be said or done quickly and… My energy, weight, and health suffered. So did my attitude because I resented people for it. BUT I was the problem because… YOU teach your boss & colleagues how to treat you! Now I have a strategy for managing the issue. It’s what I use, what I teach clients, and it works! Boundaries challenge MANY busy, professional women and... It leads to major stress! So, I’m sharing 4 tips to help YOU! But first - what do unhealthy boundaries look like? You often… • Do extra projects to avoid saying “no.” • Regularly stay for late and unscheduled meetings that “run over.” • Take NOT URGENT weekend calls and reply to emails after work hours. • Rarely take a day off - even if you’re ill or exhausted. This you? Well, none of that makes for a healthy work-life balance. It burn you out, creates stress, and makes you gain weight! Use these 4 tips to put boundaries in place: 1. Take leave: PTO is an earned benefit, so use it. Mental exhaustion is a valid use of sick leave! And letting vacation time accrue & expire doesn’t earn you pride points. 2. Clearly communicate your BUSY-NESS: Set “out of office” responses in email, on your phone, and in apps like Slack. BLOCK time for “deep mode” work. Make it visible on your calendar and shut your office door. A sign directing visitors to who can help is an appropriate way to show you’re being productive. 3. Delegate work: You do the work you’re hired to do, and you do it well. As a “team player” you occasionally take on extra projects outside your responsibilities. So when work is completely beyond the scope of your role, say “no” or delegate it to someone more suited to do it. 4. Keep work relationships professional: A job worth keeping is a job - not a family. Of course, you may have a close colleague. But do not confuse her for your BFF. It can be tricky to navigate, but maintaining these professional boundaries avoids disappointment and potential future backstabbing. My clients share horror stories. I have them too with video to prove it. In today’s business minded-work world, dog-eat-dog cultures exist. It’s not always easy, but solid boundaries help you do your best work and avoid potential toxic situations. And it protects your health! Which one of these tips do you need to work on? P.S. Use the link in the comments to join over 1,300 other busy professional women in my free LORI DODDY TOTAL WELLNESS community here on FB. I share more research based weight loss and stress management tips there!  I used to be a SLAVE to calorie counting.
I believed it was THE way to lose weight. (Until counting fat grams became hot.) I counted and cut calories - drastically. When the scale didn’t budge, I counted and cut them MORE. Then I cried because the damn scale still didn’t move! Have you been there? Here’s the thing… Calories matter - sort of. But we don’t need to count them to lose weight. And here’s why it’s a waste of your time and… It actually adds pounds to your body: 1. That tracking keeps you in “diet mode,” which feels like crap and isn’t sustainable for life! 2. Calorie counting focuses on the WRONG thing for weight loss and health. You can restrict yourself to 1200 cals a day and still GAIN weight. Calorie quality is key and to be frank, you don’t know how to evaluate that for YOUR body at your age, and your goals without expert help. Plus, calorie restriction always leads to rebound weight gain. So your “calorie counting diet” makes you fatter. 3. Food labels LIE! Say what?! Yep, laws allow for labels to be inaccurate by 20% or more depending on where you are AND… The calories listed are based on averages, which absolutely doesn’t factor in the complexity of individual digestion processes. Add to that the changes your body has undergone with age, and you’re suckered by those lying numbers. Most of you eat FAR more calories than you think EVEN if you track them. Depressed yet? Don’t be. Here’s how you beat this weight loss battle! Focus on what you eat, rather than how many calories you eat. With an expert guide’s help, not Google or some BS fad diet, you can learn how to feed your body so you stay healthy and lose weight for good! Look…I know it can be easy to fall into the diet trap. I remember being willing to do ANYTHING lose weight, and I did. I bet you have too. But it NEVER works in the long run. You’re still unhealthy. You have no energy and you’re winded bending over to tie your shoes. Nothing fits, and life just feels shitty. But it doesn’t have to be that way… And I’ll help you get a start on how to change it! Just click below and send me the word #HELP I’d start trying to lose weight and see a little progress.
So I’d stick to “my diet.” BUT the scale always stopped dropping - for what seemed like no reason at all. And I got frustrated! So I tried even harder: I cut calories, carbs, sugar, and fat. I lived on salad, grilled chicken, and broccoli! And still the scale wouldn’t budge. My family and friends would enjoy holiday drinks and goodies. And I felt more deprived. I’d work SO freaking hard only to be sad. And I’d feel a failure *again.* So I’d quit *again.* Look I get it… It’s hard to stay focused with all the yummy holiday treats around. It’s hard to exercise consistently, especially when visible results are slow to come. But I want to give you 2 perspectives to consider... 1. The diets and products you’re using are just wrong! So it’s not all you! You’re never going to get the lasting results you want using them. 2. When you DO get a proven process and accountability from a credible coach - who has overcome the struggles you face - it will take some time to reach your goals. But you CAN get some big wins in a short time!
And all of that helps you keep going! It also helps you STOP being a chronicle quitter! If that sounds good to you… And you want more research-based tips on how to lose weight for good, JOIN MY FREE TOTAL WELLNESS GROUP on Facebook! Invite your busy professional female friends and family to join you too! BUT ONLY IF... They want to be part of a supportive community for professional women that's unlike any other FB group. I do NOT...
I DO...
Want in? It went on for YEARS...
I was exhausted even though I had JUST woken up. Faint memories of my night full of thinking came back to my foggy brain. If you get this, you know. And if you don’t have time to read the rest but want it to STOP, then SCROLL TO THE BOTTOM! I never got restful sleep. My brain “ran” all night… • work projects • people (read: issues) to handle • problems to solve Stress flooded my brain and body constantly. I dragged myself to the coffee pot. Then off to a scalding hot shower. And I prayed to wake up from the haze. I wanted to lose weight and feel better. But I had no energy to do anything except come in from a long day, pull off my bra, and plop onto the couch. And dinner?! I didn’t have the brain power or time to figure that out. So we mostly ate drive though crap. I’m embarrassed now to admit that. But it was my reality because I “just couldn’t.” Did I mention I was only in my mid-late 30s at the time? I was done. Over it all. And some days I didn’t know how I could keep going. I felt horrible - about myself, about my mom-ability, and about what I was giving in our marriage. Let me be clear... I had done every fad diet. I had spent thousands on gadgets, pills, teas, detoxes, prepackaged foods, and every program. I hoped “this one” would be “the one” to fix me. But they didn’t. So I’d spiral - again. Look, I’m just saying I get it... I get you. And I’m saying…
YOU all deserve that! YOU DESERVE THAT LIFE! And it doesn’t take a crazy, time consuming commitment. But making real change does take a proven process and credible help from a woman who’s faced and overcome it. And when you’re truly sick of living in your waking hell, you don’t let anything stop you. Am I right? I'd love to hear your thoughts and struggles too. So… I don’t get it when a woman says, “I have to ask my husband.”
Don’t get me wrong - Roger and I respect each other. That means we ask for the others’ opinion and listen carefully to that feedback. But I don’t “ask permission” to do anything or to invest in myself - even when that investment is huge. And neither does he. Here’s why: We support each other - even if we don’t completely agree. If your relationship includes having to “ask” to do something that betters you, makes you happier, and improves your health… I’d consider WHY. What does that say about his trust and control, his support, and his desires for YOUR needs? I’m curious… What are your thoughts on this? This has to change!
When it happened 7 years ago, my sides bulged over my pants, my suit jacket wouldn’t button, and I came home from the office dead ass tired every single day. The sight of that fat and the exhaustion disgusted me. And as badly as I wanted it to change, I feared failing again. I had done every diet and lost weight only to gain it all back - again and again. So I wondered if I could actually make it happen for REAL. And frankly, I was also embarrassed to tell Roger that I was spending more money on trying to lose weight. [Don’t mistake “telling” him for “asking” him. But that discussion is for another day.] My point here is this… That “I have to do something” feeling was too strong to ignore. So through fear and doubt, I did it what I needed to do because I deserve to feel good! Many women reading this are feeling exactly what I’m talking about. You desperately need to make a change but… You’re letting fear keep you stuck - in bad relationships, in jobs you hate, and from losing the weight that’s making you despise the way you look and feel. And I get it because I did that too many times to count before I finally STOPPED! It was scary in the beginning, for sure. But when I stopped letting fear rule my life, I dropped the weight and felt so much better. I also saw power, control, confidence when I looked in the mirror. BUT an even more positive impact took shape in that change. Through improving my physical and mental health, I developed the strength to take complete control of every other aspect of my life. And THAT strength showed up big when my work life became unbearable. This time, fear and doubt were even louder, but I faced them bravely and left a system (and people) that no longer aligned with my ethics, beliefs, and values. I can trace my ability to take that leap back to the day I looked in the mirror, disgusted and said: THIS HAS TO CHANGE! It was a direct result of the real strength I’d created. And that’s when I truly began living a life of joy beyond what I’d ever imagined. You see - this change I share with you and help women make is so much more than losing weight. It’s about living life on your terms - with power, integrity, kindness, choice, faith, and joy! But it has to start with a decision to stop giving into the fear that’s keeping you paralyzed in unhappiness and weakness. I decided to CHOOSE how I wanted to feel and look, and that led to being powerful enough to CHOOSE how I want to live! If you know THIS HAS TO CHANGE, but you’re stuck in fear…
You have one shot - one opportunity - to seize everything you ever wanted - everything you want! So I’d love to hear your experiences and thoughts on this I’d love to know if you will capture your shot or let it slip by? [Thank you, Eminem, for the Inspo.] You know it, right? The dread that comes as you face all the clothes you know won’t fit. Then then disgust as you stand over a pile of clothes after you tried on 10 outfits. You tugged on and stretched out the shirts. You “sucked it in” to zip jeans. In the end, you’re in tears and feel “fat.” For a split second, SHE flashed into my head today. Then I pulled on these jeans and smiled remembering that’s not my life anymore. That fat girl still tries to visit me every once in a while. She tries to pull me back into her fear and lack of confidence. But my mind is as STRONG as my body now. So her voice is much softer and her emotions carry far less power these days. If you still struggle with her, please hear this… Losing weight is awesome. Buying skinny jeans is amazing. But you get rid of those negative feelings about yourself by working on your INSIDES and your outsides! I’d love to hear your experiences with the closet. Are you still in that struggle?  3 REASONS CALORIE COUNTING DOESN’T WORK!
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So why do I still fear the dye decision? Well, it's multi-layered. (See how I added that hair humor? 💇)...
I guess on the surface, I'm afraid that if I do something different, it will look like crap. Ok... so that's vain, but it's true. I don't want "ugly hair." I've tried to go darker twice and both time, I didn't think it looked natural. (See the photo at the time?!) And once it didn't even "take." Each time I washed it, the dark ran out in the water. Within a week or two, it had drastically faded to a flat, mousey brown. No shine, no depth, just BLAH and ugly! So there's that.
At this time of year, I also worry that I'll regret going darker. I mean, the summer sun is coming. And that's when I typically go a little LIGHTER. Is this overcast, gloomier time of year making me think "dark" right now? I don't want to regret my choice when it's 95 degrees outside. At this time of year in the past, I've decided to stay light "now" and then "go darker next fall." And that sounds like a good plan, but I never do it, so I don't want that to be how I make the decision this time.
And still thinking on the surface here...
I worry about how darker hair will look with my skin. I've asked colorists this question many, many times, and they just say I can do "whatever." Uh... I think it's a valid question with a definite answer: "What the hell hair color would look best with my skin?" Light, dark, in between? I'd really like to know so I can make a better choice.
Finally, I ALWAYS take photos of what I want when I go for my appointment. And to tell you the truth, my new color job never comes out like the photo. Don't get me wrong. Most often, I LIKE what I get, but it's not like the picture. My good friend (who does hair) tells me I'm just too picky. Maybe I am... but it still makes me hesitant to ask for something other than what I already have. Too much room to screw it up, ya know?!
Ok, so all of those things are issues for me, but if I'm honest, there are fears that run deeper than any of that...
I have been some shade of blonde for my whole life. Friends and colleagues know me that way. I've been referred as "a blonde" - in both negative and positive ways. You know what I mean... I've gotten attitude about being blonde. Like when I've been told that I got "that job" or "that grade" because I'm "pretty and blonde." Whatevs... I bust my ass, and I've got brains too, and I know it. So it doesn't bother me when that happens. In fact, I probably embrace that I break the stereotype. #rebel
Here's a biggie... My husband fell in love with a blonde. I know - you're thinking that he fell in love with ME, and I get that. But he was attracted to a blonde and even though he tells me to do what I want, I still know he likes the blonde (probably a lot). And yes, that matters.
I guess on the surface, I'm afraid that if I do something different, it will look like crap. Ok... so that's vain, but it's true. I don't want "ugly hair." I've tried to go darker twice and both time, I didn't think it looked natural. (See the photo at the time?!) And once it didn't even "take." Each time I washed it, the dark ran out in the water. Within a week or two, it had drastically faded to a flat, mousey brown. No shine, no depth, just BLAH and ugly! So there's that.
At this time of year, I also worry that I'll regret going darker. I mean, the summer sun is coming. And that's when I typically go a little LIGHTER. Is this overcast, gloomier time of year making me think "dark" right now? I don't want to regret my choice when it's 95 degrees outside. At this time of year in the past, I've decided to stay light "now" and then "go darker next fall." And that sounds like a good plan, but I never do it, so I don't want that to be how I make the decision this time.
And still thinking on the surface here...
I worry about how darker hair will look with my skin. I've asked colorists this question many, many times, and they just say I can do "whatever." Uh... I think it's a valid question with a definite answer: "What the hell hair color would look best with my skin?" Light, dark, in between? I'd really like to know so I can make a better choice.
Finally, I ALWAYS take photos of what I want when I go for my appointment. And to tell you the truth, my new color job never comes out like the photo. Don't get me wrong. Most often, I LIKE what I get, but it's not like the picture. My good friend (who does hair) tells me I'm just too picky. Maybe I am... but it still makes me hesitant to ask for something other than what I already have. Too much room to screw it up, ya know?!
Ok, so all of those things are issues for me, but if I'm honest, there are fears that run deeper than any of that...
I have been some shade of blonde for my whole life. Friends and colleagues know me that way. I've been referred as "a blonde" - in both negative and positive ways. You know what I mean... I've gotten attitude about being blonde. Like when I've been told that I got "that job" or "that grade" because I'm "pretty and blonde." Whatevs... I bust my ass, and I've got brains too, and I know it. So it doesn't bother me when that happens. In fact, I probably embrace that I break the stereotype. #rebel
Here's a biggie... My husband fell in love with a blonde. I know - you're thinking that he fell in love with ME, and I get that. But he was attracted to a blonde and even though he tells me to do what I want, I still know he likes the blonde (probably a lot). And yes, that matters.
And another big one...
I also fear that I think of MYSELF a certain way as a blonde or BECAUSE I'm blonde. I mean, maybe it's part of my (self) identity. Is that possible? I mean, is being blonde somehow connected to WHO I am? It shouldn't be, should it? But that's a scary thing to contemplate.
For me (and I suspect for a lot of women), this is mostly about change...
My life has changed a lot in the last year and a half. We moved, my kiddo went to college, we became "empty nesters," and I got a new (more stressful) job where there's a whole new work culture. That's a lot of change and a lot of adjustment in a short time.
I'm also inching toward 50, I've gotten healthy and fit, and I've started my own business...
So I have changed A LOT on the inside and out, and that's made me think more about these these kinds of decisions and what they really mean. Maybe it is "just hair" - it can be colored again. But it's okay for us to think deeply about who we are and what our appearance means or says. As long as we stay connected to what's important... our values, how we treat others, and appreciating what we have.
I may not make up my mind until I sit in that chair tomorrow. And I may stick with the blonde because it's "comfortable" and what I know. But I'm a whole lot closer to being a better me now than ever before... no matter what color my hair. I hope you are to. :)
As always... thank you for being here and for reading!!!
P.S. I'd really like your thoughts and vote on the hair color too. LOL!
I also fear that I think of MYSELF a certain way as a blonde or BECAUSE I'm blonde. I mean, maybe it's part of my (self) identity. Is that possible? I mean, is being blonde somehow connected to WHO I am? It shouldn't be, should it? But that's a scary thing to contemplate.
For me (and I suspect for a lot of women), this is mostly about change...
My life has changed a lot in the last year and a half. We moved, my kiddo went to college, we became "empty nesters," and I got a new (more stressful) job where there's a whole new work culture. That's a lot of change and a lot of adjustment in a short time.
I'm also inching toward 50, I've gotten healthy and fit, and I've started my own business...
So I have changed A LOT on the inside and out, and that's made me think more about these these kinds of decisions and what they really mean. Maybe it is "just hair" - it can be colored again. But it's okay for us to think deeply about who we are and what our appearance means or says. As long as we stay connected to what's important... our values, how we treat others, and appreciating what we have.
I may not make up my mind until I sit in that chair tomorrow. And I may stick with the blonde because it's "comfortable" and what I know. But I'm a whole lot closer to being a better me now than ever before... no matter what color my hair. I hope you are to. :)
As always... thank you for being here and for reading!!!
P.S. I'd really like your thoughts and vote on the hair color too. LOL!
Want to get healthy and fit, but just not sure what to do?!
We all struggle, so don't beat yourself up about it. People tell me they have these 5 problems and I know I SURE DID, so I wanted to give you SOLUTIONS that worked for me!
SOLUTIONS to 5 Common Health+Fitness Challenges!
1. "I don't have TIME!"
SOLUTION: Schedule your workout on your calendar like an appointment! You don't miss a meeting with the boss so why disrespect yourself? Just SHOW UP! And truthfully, 10 mins of a good sweat is better than none! So start with a 10 minute PROMISE. Once you get that in your routine, bump it up to 15 then 20. Before you know it, 30 minutes each day will be part of your life!
2. "The scale just isn't moving!"
SOLUTION: Track your food! I know what you're thinking... "I know what I eat!" Maybe... But most of us eat more than we realize (bites from kids' plates, "tastes" while we cook, snacks at work meetings, etc). Track every bite, lick, and taste for a week. Then reflect on changes you need to make. (And hit me up if I can help!) Also, remember that the scale isn't the best indicator of your progress. Measure and take photos of yourself. Look for changes over time. AND... pay attention to how your clothes fit. Those jeans will tell the truth.
We all struggle, so don't beat yourself up about it. People tell me they have these 5 problems and I know I SURE DID, so I wanted to give you SOLUTIONS that worked for me!
SOLUTIONS to 5 Common Health+Fitness Challenges!
1. "I don't have TIME!"
SOLUTION: Schedule your workout on your calendar like an appointment! You don't miss a meeting with the boss so why disrespect yourself? Just SHOW UP! And truthfully, 10 mins of a good sweat is better than none! So start with a 10 minute PROMISE. Once you get that in your routine, bump it up to 15 then 20. Before you know it, 30 minutes each day will be part of your life!
2. "The scale just isn't moving!"
SOLUTION: Track your food! I know what you're thinking... "I know what I eat!" Maybe... But most of us eat more than we realize (bites from kids' plates, "tastes" while we cook, snacks at work meetings, etc). Track every bite, lick, and taste for a week. Then reflect on changes you need to make. (And hit me up if I can help!) Also, remember that the scale isn't the best indicator of your progress. Measure and take photos of yourself. Look for changes over time. AND... pay attention to how your clothes fit. Those jeans will tell the truth.
3. "I can't get up early to workout & that's the ONLY time I can fit it in my busy schedule!"
SOLUTION: A routine is important to sticking with workouts. But you have to find a time what works for YOUR body and mind. Try getting up just 15 minutes early for a week to exercise. When you get comfortable, bump it up to 20 mins then to 30. If the morning is just not thing... then try exercising just before bed. A lot of people I help enjoy the exercise and shower just before slumber.
4. "Healthy eating costs too much!"
SOLUTION: Buy lean meats in bulk and buy fruit in season. I buy family packs of chicken, cook them, then freeze in portions I will use. I also buy frozen fruit (and veggies too) because they're cheaper than fresh! There are tons more ways to save, but the bottom line is this: Spend money on what's important. Medical bills and pills are WAY more expensive than food. Yo!
SOLUTION: A routine is important to sticking with workouts. But you have to find a time what works for YOUR body and mind. Try getting up just 15 minutes early for a week to exercise. When you get comfortable, bump it up to 20 mins then to 30. If the morning is just not thing... then try exercising just before bed. A lot of people I help enjoy the exercise and shower just before slumber.
4. "Healthy eating costs too much!"
SOLUTION: Buy lean meats in bulk and buy fruit in season. I buy family packs of chicken, cook them, then freeze in portions I will use. I also buy frozen fruit (and veggies too) because they're cheaper than fresh! There are tons more ways to save, but the bottom line is this: Spend money on what's important. Medical bills and pills are WAY more expensive than food. Yo!
5. "I don't know how or where to start!"
SOLUTION: Commit to a structured eating & workout plan. A simple, healthy plan to nutrition and exercise is the best way to ensure you reach your weightless goals. (And there are TONS of good plans available. Message me if you want help.)
LIKE Butterfly Bodyz Fitness on Facebook for more tips!!!
***Have another tip? Add it in the comments!***
In January I began training and set the goal of running a 1/2 marathon in April. Well... that race happened today, and I ran every.single.step!
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Training for and running that marathon has been one of the biggest physical and MENTAL undertakings of my life. I’ve wanted to "be a runner" for as long as I can remember, but if I'm honest, I never really believed I would or could be. People who know me will read that and probably think, “What?! Doesn’t she think she can do anything?!” I get way too… On the outside I appeared so self-assured and happy. (I did and still do laugh a lot.) But that laughter wasn't always a reflection of how I REALLY felt on the INSIDE.
I spent years hiding behind smiles and laughter when a lot of the time, I was insecure and sad about how I looked and questioned my ability to “do” lots of things. Don’t get me wrong…I accomplished a lot despite that insecurity, but it was always there whispering doubts in my ear: You can't do THAT! Give up - it won't work. Don't START - you won't succeed. And a LOUD one: You're not as pretty/smart/good as you should be! I listened to those whispers a lot too... In so many ways, that negative talk held me back and also led to some pretty destructive behavior.
NOT ANYMORE… I've realized some things on this fit journey. First, that this IS a journey; I have not and will never completely "arrive." But I will continue making progress, and I am really proud of how far I’ve come. I also KNOW that I CAN! I can and did change that talk, and I CAN do more than I ever believed!
I spent years hiding behind smiles and laughter when a lot of the time, I was insecure and sad about how I looked and questioned my ability to “do” lots of things. Don’t get me wrong…I accomplished a lot despite that insecurity, but it was always there whispering doubts in my ear: You can't do THAT! Give up - it won't work. Don't START - you won't succeed. And a LOUD one: You're not as pretty/smart/good as you should be! I listened to those whispers a lot too... In so many ways, that negative talk held me back and also led to some pretty destructive behavior.
NOT ANYMORE… I've realized some things on this fit journey. First, that this IS a journey; I have not and will never completely "arrive." But I will continue making progress, and I am really proud of how far I’ve come. I also KNOW that I CAN! I can and did change that talk, and I CAN do more than I ever believed!
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This evening as I lay here resting, I am reflecting on what I’ve accomplished just in the last year since committing to my health and fitness! I’ve lost 30 pounds. I am in the BEST shape of my life. But more importantly, I am healthy and FEEL like a totally different person! I am also TRULY confident AND happy! I KNOW I can do anything when I decide, set a goal, and commit to it. If that happens…That goal is MINE! Doubts? Are you freaking kidding me?!?! I RAN 13.1 miles completing a ½ marathon today! What’s next?! Just watch and see!!! #believe
Hugs,
Lori :)
P.S. After that race today... THIS happened! LOL
Hugs,
Lori :)
P.S. After that race today... THIS happened! LOL
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P.S.S That smile and laughter are REAL nowadays too!
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I write this VERY FIRST BLOG POST with some nervousness and lots of excitement. Yikes!!! Before I start, I'll tell you that picture above - that's me today. I am not perfect; in fact, I have many imperfections. But I am better today on the INSIDE and OUTSIDE than I have ever been in my life, and that's what this first post is about.
But first...
Perhaps it's silly, but I've dreamed of being a blogger for a number of years. I am a writer; I've written articles, even a dissertation, but I just couldn't seem to latch onto anything passionately enough to write about it (and stick with writing about it). Then last year, I became a fitness coach. And frankly, at first, I was a little embarrassed. (This may be a whole other post in itself, but I had a major hang up with being a "fitness coach." I do not look like a fitness guru, I am NOT a gym rat, and I am NOT a salesperson. Well thank gosh, none of those things are requirements OR even desirable in a coach! More on that issue later. I must get on with THIS post. [smile]
I've had a long and storied relationship with my health, and I've never been fit. You see, I was a "fat kid," felt like the "fat girl" in high school, and was certainly a "fat woman" at different times as an adult. (I've also struggled with anorexia and been terribly and dangerously thin. Again, another post.) So while I've "dieted" MANY times in my life, I have never been healthy. About 18 years ago, I lost over 100 pounds and since then, I've fought with the same 10, 20, even 30 pounds. I've gained it. I've lost it. I've gained it... Well, you get the picture. Much of that loss came in very unhealthy and punishing ways.
But first...
Perhaps it's silly, but I've dreamed of being a blogger for a number of years. I am a writer; I've written articles, even a dissertation, but I just couldn't seem to latch onto anything passionately enough to write about it (and stick with writing about it). Then last year, I became a fitness coach. And frankly, at first, I was a little embarrassed. (This may be a whole other post in itself, but I had a major hang up with being a "fitness coach." I do not look like a fitness guru, I am NOT a gym rat, and I am NOT a salesperson. Well thank gosh, none of those things are requirements OR even desirable in a coach! More on that issue later. I must get on with THIS post. [smile]
I've had a long and storied relationship with my health, and I've never been fit. You see, I was a "fat kid," felt like the "fat girl" in high school, and was certainly a "fat woman" at different times as an adult. (I've also struggled with anorexia and been terribly and dangerously thin. Again, another post.) So while I've "dieted" MANY times in my life, I have never been healthy. About 18 years ago, I lost over 100 pounds and since then, I've fought with the same 10, 20, even 30 pounds. I've gained it. I've lost it. I've gained it... Well, you get the picture. Much of that loss came in very unhealthy and punishing ways.
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A few years ago, I was doing better - eating a bit healthier and even running 2 miles several mornings a week. Then... I changed jobs. I accepted a position that gave me a nice promotion and a raise. But (there's always a but) it also required a long commute, included many work hours, and caused tons of stress. I suppose any new position is stressful (especially if you're a freaky perfectionist), but this one ranks above average in that area and "that's all I have to say about that." (Imagine my best Forest Gump voice.)
During the first year of my new gig, my health took a nosedive and fast! I stopped running completely, so I was sitting at a desk (or in endless meetings) and getting zero exercise. When I ate, which was usually only dinner and always very late, it was fast food. I did not drink water. And that really means, I did not drink anything unless it was lots of coffee and/or lots of Pepsi (thinking I "needed" the caffeine to survive). I quickly gained 10 then 15 then 20 and ultimately about 25 pounds! I FELT HORRIBLE both physically and mentally. I looked in the mirror and HATED what I saw: "fat" thighs and stomach, bulging hips and a muffin top, and a haggard and tired face. Worse... I was SO fatigued, exhausted, and generally sick feeling that many days when I got home, I put on PJs and went to bed. On top of all of that, I suffer from debilitating migraines, and I managed to make those events MUCH worse by not taking care of myself. I had a severe migraine almost daily - some so extreme that I experienced the worst side effects ever! (I won't go into all of the gory details, but trust me when I tell you that it was a BAD time.)
During the first year of my new gig, my health took a nosedive and fast! I stopped running completely, so I was sitting at a desk (or in endless meetings) and getting zero exercise. When I ate, which was usually only dinner and always very late, it was fast food. I did not drink water. And that really means, I did not drink anything unless it was lots of coffee and/or lots of Pepsi (thinking I "needed" the caffeine to survive). I quickly gained 10 then 15 then 20 and ultimately about 25 pounds! I FELT HORRIBLE both physically and mentally. I looked in the mirror and HATED what I saw: "fat" thighs and stomach, bulging hips and a muffin top, and a haggard and tired face. Worse... I was SO fatigued, exhausted, and generally sick feeling that many days when I got home, I put on PJs and went to bed. On top of all of that, I suffer from debilitating migraines, and I managed to make those events MUCH worse by not taking care of myself. I had a severe migraine almost daily - some so extreme that I experienced the worst side effects ever! (I won't go into all of the gory details, but trust me when I tell you that it was a BAD time.)
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Last year, I got it all on track for the first time in my life. But it started with a breaking point... I knew I HAD to make a change. The weight, the fatigue, the stress - it all had to stop. I had to just start - that's really the hardest part for me. So I did, and I was making good progress with my nutrition (or so I thought). I had given up the fast food, quit drinking all soda, and added lots of water to my intake. I saw some success, too. I dropped a few pounds. But I STILL had no energy, I hadn't completely committed, and somewhere deep down I questioned if I would "really do it," feeling like the journey I faced was LONG. And so, I was still frustrated.
I didn't realize it then, but several events coincided to change my life. One weekend, I sat on the couch flipping channels, and I landed on an infomercial (which I NEVER stop for), but this one, I did. On that program, "Mary" talked about how she lost 60 pounds using the 21 Day Fix program. She explained the program as a "lifestyle" of eating healthy real foods and exercising. It rang true to me... In my heart and head, I knew eating right and exercising was the ONLY healthy way to lose weight and keep it off. I listened and even hit "record" to save the program. The next weekend, I saw "Mary" on TV again. And again, I stopped surfing and listened. And again, her words resonated. Then it clicked... A few months earlier, a fashion blogger I followed had talked about quitting her "real job" to become a fitness coach; she said she was coaching people as they worked to get healthy using fitness programs. I immediately wondered if she worked with the program Mary used. I had read her blog for a few years, but she had no idea who I was. I just FELT like I knew her because…and this is important... because she wrote so genuinely, sharing stories that showed she was a normal, NOT a perfect woman. Her "realness" allowed me to trust that she would tell me the truth. So… I messaged her, shared a few things about my "story" that I'd NEVER told anyone, and I asked her about the program and if it "really" worked. She talked openly with me and seemed to care, and she did not try to "sell" me on anything. We chatted, she told me about her challenge groups, and she offered to help me. I KNEW this is what I needed... to get on track for real.
Funny... I joined that first challenge group, and I was ready, but even then, I did not completely commit. I followed the meal plan, learning that I had to eat MORE food – the RIGHT kinds of foods - which seemed so weird to me at first. But I read about nutrition and learned about cutting out sugar and preservatives. I (re)educated myself about so many things! To be honest though, I wasn’t doing the exercises. During the first round (of 21 days), I did about three workouts, and they were hard! I was SO out of shaped that I huffed and puffed even during the warm-ups. But something started to happen… the more I engaged with the women in the challenge group and saw their results, the more motivated I was to get those results for myself. They talked about their energy and how great they felt, so I pressed play and worked out on more days in the next round, and I made sure to drink my Shakeology. Pretty soon… I was excited because I felt great! In the group, I shared my little daily "wins" (and struggles too), recipes I was trying, and ultimately, my before and “in progress” photos. I realized that I was changing… not only on the outside, but on the INSIDE too. As my body became healthy and fit, my mind and behaviors also transformed. Stress wasn’t affecting me in the same negative way. I wasn’t getting angry as quickly. I was just kinder to people around me. And I started realizing that I was generally and genuinely happy! Oh, and I lost 30 pounds too! Woo-hoo! :)
I didn't realize it then, but several events coincided to change my life. One weekend, I sat on the couch flipping channels, and I landed on an infomercial (which I NEVER stop for), but this one, I did. On that program, "Mary" talked about how she lost 60 pounds using the 21 Day Fix program. She explained the program as a "lifestyle" of eating healthy real foods and exercising. It rang true to me... In my heart and head, I knew eating right and exercising was the ONLY healthy way to lose weight and keep it off. I listened and even hit "record" to save the program. The next weekend, I saw "Mary" on TV again. And again, I stopped surfing and listened. And again, her words resonated. Then it clicked... A few months earlier, a fashion blogger I followed had talked about quitting her "real job" to become a fitness coach; she said she was coaching people as they worked to get healthy using fitness programs. I immediately wondered if she worked with the program Mary used. I had read her blog for a few years, but she had no idea who I was. I just FELT like I knew her because…and this is important... because she wrote so genuinely, sharing stories that showed she was a normal, NOT a perfect woman. Her "realness" allowed me to trust that she would tell me the truth. So… I messaged her, shared a few things about my "story" that I'd NEVER told anyone, and I asked her about the program and if it "really" worked. She talked openly with me and seemed to care, and she did not try to "sell" me on anything. We chatted, she told me about her challenge groups, and she offered to help me. I KNEW this is what I needed... to get on track for real.
Funny... I joined that first challenge group, and I was ready, but even then, I did not completely commit. I followed the meal plan, learning that I had to eat MORE food – the RIGHT kinds of foods - which seemed so weird to me at first. But I read about nutrition and learned about cutting out sugar and preservatives. I (re)educated myself about so many things! To be honest though, I wasn’t doing the exercises. During the first round (of 21 days), I did about three workouts, and they were hard! I was SO out of shaped that I huffed and puffed even during the warm-ups. But something started to happen… the more I engaged with the women in the challenge group and saw their results, the more motivated I was to get those results for myself. They talked about their energy and how great they felt, so I pressed play and worked out on more days in the next round, and I made sure to drink my Shakeology. Pretty soon… I was excited because I felt great! In the group, I shared my little daily "wins" (and struggles too), recipes I was trying, and ultimately, my before and “in progress” photos. I realized that I was changing… not only on the outside, but on the INSIDE too. As my body became healthy and fit, my mind and behaviors also transformed. Stress wasn’t affecting me in the same negative way. I wasn’t getting angry as quickly. I was just kinder to people around me. And I started realizing that I was generally and genuinely happy! Oh, and I lost 30 pounds too! Woo-hoo! :)
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So I am back to the beginning…
I've had a long and storied relationship with my health, but I wouldn’t change any of it for many reasons! I was never really healthy or fit before, but I AM BOTH NOW! That journey to fitness also led me to coaching. And with that, I finally understand what it means when people say, “Find what you love and make that your job. If you do, you’ll never WORK a day in your life.” I LOVE coaching! It keeps me accountable to my own health and fitness, and I coach Challenge Groups now where I get to help others realize THEIR goals too. I wake up STOKED for life now, and this “job” never feels “work.” That’s worth all the sweat and squats in the world, folks!!! Oh, and I am finally a blogger too!
Thank you for reading. I really appreciate it more than you could ever know!
Hugs,
Lori :)
I've had a long and storied relationship with my health, but I wouldn’t change any of it for many reasons! I was never really healthy or fit before, but I AM BOTH NOW! That journey to fitness also led me to coaching. And with that, I finally understand what it means when people say, “Find what you love and make that your job. If you do, you’ll never WORK a day in your life.” I LOVE coaching! It keeps me accountable to my own health and fitness, and I coach Challenge Groups now where I get to help others realize THEIR goals too. I wake up STOKED for life now, and this “job” never feels “work.” That’s worth all the sweat and squats in the world, folks!!! Oh, and I am finally a blogger too!
Thank you for reading. I really appreciate it more than you could ever know!
Hugs,
Lori :)
Hi, I'm Lori!
I'm a wife, mom, grandma, former college professor and VP, turned weight loss and fitness professional passionate about helping busy, professional women lose weight and manage burnout levels of stress, so you live comfortable and confident in your own skin - and never diet again.
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